A Bittersweet Legacy

 Carolyn here: Michael Quiring, one of the therapists here, is one of my favourite people. His dad has been struggling…I’vbeen asking him about his dad’s health for years. Michael’s dad became acutely ill a few weeks ago. I spoke to him early last week…the situation was grave, and the odds were stacked against recovery, but his dad …

Before it’s too late

I was talking recently to some of my colleagues about couples therapy. One of the topics that came up was the reluctance of one partner to hear the other spouse’s pain…and do something about it. Sometimes, when couples come to therapy, we ask the couples which one is the “draggee” in therapy, and one the …

Poster of one man helping another over the wall..."We don't have to do it alone. We were never meant to" Brene Brown quote

A letter to a potential client: Yep, therapy is hard

Dear Potential Client: As a person contemplating entering counselling, I feel like there are a few things you need to know.  A lot more people have considered counselling than have actually made an appointment.  So…a lot of people wonder about making an appointment, maybe even want to make an appointment…but don’t. I just wanna make …

Comforting Power of a Parent

So,  parenting is hard, eh?  Brutal. Some days, you gotta wonder if all your efforts matter.  If you matter. Some days, we as parents mess up, screw up, yell too much, micro manage, over-parent, under-parent, can’t-play-dressy-up-even-one-more-time, or use the screen as a babysitter in an all together unsatisfying way. But we always got something our …

Hump Day Nudge: Great Dads

“My name’s dad…and proud of it…all dads should be.” {! social/video/youtube?url=http%3A//youtu.be/6GYxH2-WeZY !} I love peanut butter. But I’m not at all sure about mixing peanut butter and Cheerios. I am completely sure that this is the sort of dad that is inspiring… I think it’s something about the encouragement, empowerment, boundaries, playfulness, affirmation towards his …

Life Opportunity #3: Express your feelings

I recently spoke to a group of young adults (and their teachers/family/friends) at their high school graduation. I’ve written beforeabout Bronnie Ware’s The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying. These themes are also echoed within the walls of our therapy offices at Bergen and Associates every day, and whispered to each other in The Daring Way™ groups that I offer regularly. And I …

Men making friends

Guys have a lot of fun together.  Guys enjoy each other’s company.  Guys eat, drink, burp and so much more with each other. But are they friends? A friend is someone you share mutual affection with.  A confidant.  Intimacy is a part of friendship. In our culture, too often authentic, meaningful friendship has been feminized. …