It's at really tough moments in our lives that problems happen.
The transition is a difficult adjustment, and at times, the very nature of the transition can make the adjustment difficult. For example, moving to another city can be stressful and lonely--and the friends who have been there to support you in previous difficult times now live in a different city!
Seeing a counselor at a time of transition or crisis often entails a few sessions to be able to “hear yourself talk out loud”. A therapist can carefully hear you into a deeper understanding of yourself and the situation.
Working through traumatic life events
Our past experiences impact on our current state of functioning in our lives. Growing up in a home where a parent was alcoholic, abusive, or absent can affect who we are and how we think of ourselves. Experiences of violation or trauma in whatever form can color the way we view the world and our place in it.
Sexual abuse is a painful but often hidden experience that people long to deal with. Difficult times in relationships, or experiences of failure can continue to echo in our lives long after the experience.
Several therapists have extensive experience at working with survivors of trauma as individuals and with their partners. At Conexus Counselling, we are here to assist you in working through these traumatic life events.
Parenting issues
It seems, at times, that a parent can “get a handle” on parenting a child. Then the child changes to the next stage, and suddenly nothing you do as a parent seems to be effective.
Watching children struggle with rage, or struggle against the structure of a household is painful for both parent and child. Looking after the needs of multiple children in a family when they have different personalities and different ways they need parenting is a challenge.
Sometimes a child can be struggling with a life circumstance themselves, like parents who are in high conflict or separating or being bullied at school.
Sometimes, as much as a parent might want to connect, the distance between parent and child seems so large, it seems almost impossible to connect.
It can feel like the child is pushing you as parents away--which often happens at the precise moment that a child is so desperately hoping to be loved.
Parents want to love their children effectively so that the child feels the security and comfort that a parent's love provides. Parenting issues can also arise when the family is blended and new rules and understandings need to be negotiated.
Job Change/Loss/Retirement
A person spends enormous hours of their waking time at work, dedicating energy and passion to the employer. Western culture often links value and quality of work to one’s own personal value. Often significant relationships are formed with colleagues and staff. When a job suddenly ends, the loss can be devastating for a variety of reasons.
Grieving of Death of Loved One
The pain and devastation of a loss of a spouse, child or other close relative is excruciating. The raw emotions of grief can include sadness, rage, hopelessness. The ocean of grief can feel as though it is overwhelming.
Grief is normal, even tho painful. The support of family and friends is vital...and often enough. However, for those who need it, therapy can provide an important space. A place to express the emotions and explore the significance of the loss of your loved one. Grief can be complex and bring on feelings and old memories that catches one by surprise. Sometimes friends and family are at a loss of how to help someone who is grieving. There are times when talking to a counsellor can help sort through this pain.
Significant Loss such as Divorce
Other losses can also be painful and may go unrecognized by others. It can feel like people don't understand that even though no one died, there is significant loss that is devastating.
Often the support of family and friends through a difficult period of loss is all that is needed to “get through”. However, when grieving feels prolonged or particularly lonely, or when a person feels “stuck” in their grief, a counselor can be a helpful and supportive resource.
Difficulty Connecting with Others
It is an uncomfortable feeling to want to be close to another but to notice that when given the opportunity, you push it away.
- You may have a pattern where relationships with new romantic interests don't last long.
- A person wants to enjoy family but finds their family experiences painful
- A person feels lonely, and intends to form ties, but backs out or avoids social opportunities.
It's hard to long to be close to others, or more particularly, "that special someone" and find that good intentions and desire are sufficient to overcome the internal barriers that keep others. away.
Spiritual crisis
During just about any life experience, a person’s worldview or belief in God can be challenged. At Conexus Counselling, we are sensitive of the impact of spirituality on a person’s soul and are open to exploring that together with you as you talk about your issues. Please feel comfortable discussing the impact of your faith on the issues you bring to therapy.
There are therapists available to explore the issue you bring to counselling in light of your faith in Jesus Christ and Jesus' presence in your life. Please mention that you would like to work with a therapist who is a Christian when you call to book an appointment.
Finding deeper meaning in life, and exploring the impact of your fundamental beliefs is something many long for. Regardless of your religious tradition (or lack thereof), we want to work with you to create a safe space to ask the important questions.