New Book: My Marriage is Almost Dead…

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

I heard a story about some acquaintances  a few days ago…the couple had been married for several years.  The wife was unhappy, but she hated confrontation.  She didn’t want to say anything that would hurt her husband. She didn’t want to be the source that created long and difficult conversations. So she said nothing. The situation …

Hypothesis of generosity

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

I want you to think of the last time somebody was angry at you. What were they angry about? Did you actually intend to hurt them? If so, why was it important to hurt them? If not, what did they not understand about you? Maybe you were late for lunch with a friend, but there …

Walking me home

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

Three years ago, on the September long weekend, I left my Junior Tribe Member at the West Coast. I’ve written before about how I had dreaded the beginning of university for my youngest JTM. It might be irrational, but I felt that after a decade of being a single mom, I was feeling like I was …

The lunch that started something beautiful

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

I will always remember Sunday lunch of the August long weekend with special fondness. It was the start of a somethin-somethin with Husband and I…though it wasn’t nearly the start of our romance. Husband’s wife, Car had died in late winter. In the months leading to her death, I had asked Car’s sister of how she …

“Fault?” Not relevant!

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

I often hear someone refusing to come to counselling because they don’t have the problem: “If I’m not the rebellious one, why would I need counselling?” “He’s the one that drinks, not me.  He needs counselling, not me!” “My wife is the one that lost her parents in the accident. I don’t need help.” “The …

10 Rules of Engagement

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

Husband and I love each other, but we don’t always see eye to eye. We have to sort out disagreement and differences of opinion and perceived and actual slights just like anybody else. I don’t like it when Husband and I are at odds with each other. My world isn’t quite right when Husband and I …

Oops! A Therapist forgets empathy

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

A few weeks ago, Husband’s finger lingered over the “send” button on a text.  For a looong time, his finger hovered over the message. We had talked about it.  We had together decided on a course of action with a family member. And now, he was doing his part of the implementation, and as we sat on …

We’re a pair…of Levi’s

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

Dear Husband, Two years ago this week, we put the Gerber daisies on the tables, and set up the volleyball nets in the gym. The friends we invited came, and the relatives we invited but didn’t think would come came too and gathered around as we exchanged vows of commitment to each other.  Our kids …

If it ain’t working for you…

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

If it ain’t working for you, it ain’t working for anybody! Dear Wives-who-are-lonely, I wrote to your husbands recently in a blog post…many, many people read the post to discover how 69% of divorces are initiated by women.  Over 2/3’s of divorces happen because wives say, “Enough”. I wanted husbands to have a chance to …

Does your wife impact your life?

Share on FacebookShare on Google+Tweet about this on TwitterShare on LinkedInPin on PinterestShare on TumblrEmail this to someone

Dear husbands-whose-wives-are lonely-for-you, I’m writing this letter to you because I want you to spend the rest of your days with the love of your life. Truly I do. Some of these words may sound harsh, but they are deliberately bold and blunt because the message is so important. Some of you may recognize yourselves …