Sometimes what you were hoping would happen, falls apart…and the fall back plan ends up better than you could have imagined.
Friday afternoon was one of “those days”…I got a call from a friend who was at my house waiting for the appliance repairman…when she arrived…there was water all over the kitchen from the leaky faucet. I knew it needed repair, but I was hoping to wait until the weekend…it was leaking more than I though. :/
An hour later she called again, and this time put the repairman on the phone. The dishwasher is inoperable, and the fridge may be on it’s last legs…the “fix” would be hundreds of dollars with no guarantee of it “taking”…there is an alternative to give the fridge 72 hours of total “R and R”…and it may work when it’s had 3 days of rest. (OK…does that not sound odd? My fridge needs a long weekend of vacation…but that’s what he said).
So…now I have no fridge, no running water, and a broken dishwasher…and it’s Friday afternoon…and we’re having a guest for supper…and he eats a gluten free diet, so ordering a pizza at the last minute is NOT an option…and each junior tribe member is using the time after school to work on a science project (which means that there is a volcano in my bathtub where I am also trying to wash dishes), and one of’em notifies me at 6:00 that he actuallly has to be at an event at 7:00…and oh yeah, I have a workshop I’m doing the next morning on “Boundaries”…and I planned for some quiet time on Friday night to prep…and I’m trying to watch this video on YouTube to figure out how to fix a leaky tap.
It was either laugh or cry…I chose to laugh…mostly.
The kicker…the next night, we are having a Bergen and Associates Counselling staff party at my house.
So…as I’m standing in the middle of the office Friday afternoon, looking at the phone after the repairman finishes delivering his news…I am gazing dumbstruck. Contemplating how it will all work. Can it work? What is it gonna take to make it work?
Yikes.
And then Melanie, our office manager pipes up…”uh…my husband is out of town this weekend, so the house will be quiet. We had company on Wednesday so our house is already clean…do you want to switch the party to my house?”
My immediate response was “no”…because in my culture, when I grew up, when someone offered something so huge, so kind, that “put them out” so much…you say no. That’s with the understanding that they are being nice, but may not actually mean it…may even be hoping that you’ll know they don’t mean it…it’s meant as a gesture of support, not an actual offer.
But…I had to go into session…and sometimes the best way to make a decision is to “put it on the back burner” and do something else creative and lifegiving to put your brain in a good space.
So…after the session, I reminded myself (given that it was on top of my brain that I’m talking about “Boundaries” the next day) that she is a grown up that chose to offer her house. I checked with Melanie…is this realistic…are you seriously offering. And she assured me she was…I took a deep breath and took her up on hosting the party.
And so it was a hectic Friday night at home, a crazy Saturday morning at the Boundary Brunch, and a busy Saturday afternoon prepping for an event at her house.
I felt “fried”.
But then Saturday night came. And. It . Was. A. Blast.
Melanie’s house was the perfect home to get together. We had an “appetizer potluck” and had this beautiful array of vegetables, pastries, crackers and cheese, candied nuts, meatballs, and bacon wrapped water chestnuts. Yum-o!
(And she gave a “goodie bag” of frozen cabbage rolls to each guest as they departed…how cool is that!)
And we laughed and giggled and howled together as we shared in each other’s lives. Told funny stories about travel and adventures, about some of our recent media ventures.
Probably the funnest part of the evening was when we spent some time talking about the January Secret Partner stuff.
To brighten up our month, I had given everyone someone else’s name. It was meant to be kept secret…and throughout the month, we were all to find ways of brightening that person’s week in some way…it was to be inexpensive and not burdensome…but fun.
And it was a scream to hear the lengths people went to, to do nice things for their person…Gail came in on the weekends to leave something for Melanie…she’s always at her desk and so surprising her was hard. Some of us wrote notes with our non-dominant hand to conceal our identity…Melanie was quick to point out that my writing probably couldn’t be much messier with my left hand. There was crafty sneakiness to do nice things yet remain anonymous…and it had us in stitches imagining the lengths some folks went to, to do things in secret. Someone had some last minute misgivings about giving the TicTacs…so quickly added a note that it was given innocently, and not to suggest an issue with bad breath. Head scratchers, foot warmers, candles, lotion, little cards…wrapped up in pretty paper…or with a simple post it note.
Melanie enjoyed noticing little things sticking out of the mailboxes…and it was fun to get an email from her reminding me that I should check my mailbox. With the Starbucks card (man, he knows me!) and business card holder my secret partner gave me was a thoughtfully encouraging note that I will cherish long after the gift card has been used.
There’s just something about people doing sweet thoughtful kind things for each other that made the office an even more pleasant place to be than usual.
What seemed to me like an overwhelming event only 24 hours before, turned into an evening that I will remember long into the future…what warmed my heart down to my toes was a phrase buried in the middle of a question.
As we were visiting, Roshonna asked if there were some in the “Bergen family” of staff that would be interested in participating in the Manitoba Marathon relay as a team.
She called us a family.
A family.
Family.
Ahhhhh.
(soft smile)
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